Paddling Perspectives:
Your Cosmic Paddling Questions Answered
November 2019
by Kent Walters
AUTHOR’S NOTE: This column is intended to be funny, but I sneak in some good information as well.
Q: What are the odds of a paddler being struck by lightning?
A: First, some little-known facts:
1. Lightning strikes about 25 million times a year in the US.
2. Most people who die or are injured by lightening get it from ground current, not a direct hit.
3. Most lightning damage to the human body is to the brain and nerves.
4. If you are paddling, you are exposed to three times the probability of interaction with lightning than the rest of the population during the time you are on the water.
5. An average of 12 people a year are killed in the US by lightning.
So, now for the probability: In the US there are approximately 329,496,652 people. Let’s round up to 20 killed in a year to account for variability, which would probably yield about 200 more injured, for a total of 220 significantly affected by lightning every year. Multiply by 3 for your activity of boating/paddling, and your probability of being killed or injured by lightning is a whopping (220 ∕ 329,496,652) x3 = 2.00306E-06, or 0.0002%, or about 1:500,000. To put this in perspective, because of your paddling preference, you have increased your chances of death or injury by lightning over that of a normal person who does not golf or tend cattle in the rain by a whopping two 100,000th of a percent.
NOTE: If you live in Florida and paddle a lot, your odds increase.
I would be willing to insure you against death by lightning until climate change significantly increases these odds, even if you live in Florida.
Q: What is a skeg?
A1: This is a kayaker code word constructed similar to pig-latin where the last letter is moved to the front of the word. In this case it translates to “kegs”, as in multiple containers of beer.
A2: A flat piece of plastic at the stern of a kayak along the center-line or keel that can be lowered to provide better tracking in flat water.
Q: Do canoes have skegs? If not, why not?
A1: Canoeists are generally more responsible than kayakers, and have no need to cloak their language in gimmicky code.
A2: Whitewater canoeists are generally more talented and capable than kayakers, and take pride in their ability to control their boats using proper and well-practiced strokes, though I have often wondered why I have never seen a whitewater canoe with a skeg option to be used in the flat water between rapids, or for beginners, or for lazy canoeists. After all, it would be just as easy to mold in the housing and hardware tracks to a canoe as a kayak, and easier to maintain in a canoe. In my mind, manufacturers are leaving money on the table not to offer this option for a premium “cross-over” model. Go figure . . .
Q: Can you use the word “disembogue” in a sentence about canoeing?
A: Why not? “It was right where the river disembogued from its channel into the gulf that my kayak became an item of interest to three large sharks.”
Q: Who is the cute girl paddling the canoe on the cover of the 2000 edition of “Rivers and Rapids”?
A: I don’t know.
Q: Something seems a little “off” in the photo. Do you see it?
A: Yes, I do.
IT HAS BEEN SAID THAT . . .
Home is where the dog and the canoe are.
OVERHEARD . . .
If I’m not kayaking, I’m thinking about it.
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| The author, Kent Walters |